Chapter 17
The Weight of Money and Friendship
After Anna Mikháylovna had driven off with her son to visit Count Cyril Vladímirovich Bezúkhov, Countess Rostóva sat for a long time all alone applying her handkerchief to her eyes. At last she rang. “What is the matter with you, my dear?” she said crossly to the maid who kept her waiting some minutes. “Don’t you wish to serve me? Then I’ll find you another place.” The countess was upset by her friend’s sorrow and humiliating poverty, and was therefore out of sorts, a state of mind which with her always found expression in calling her maid “my dear” and…
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Critical Thinking Exercise
Track Your Stress Displacement
For the next week, notice when you feel irritated or short with someone. Before reacting, pause and ask: 'What am I really upset about?' Write down three instances where you caught yourself about to take stress out on the wrong person. What was the real source of your frustration in each case?
Consider:
- •Look for patterns in who you target when stressed (family, coworkers, service workers)
- •Notice if the real source of stress feels too risky or overwhelming to confront directly
- •Pay attention to how power dynamics influence where you direct frustration
Journaling Prompt
Write about a time when someone took their stress out on you unfairly. How did it feel? What do you wish they had done instead? How can this memory help you break the displacement pattern in your own life?
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