Pierre's Transformation Through Love — War and Peace

There is nothing in Pierre's soul now like what troubled it during his courtship of Helene. He does not repeat his words with a sickening shame, or ask why he said I love you. On the contrary he repeats in imagination every word he or Natasha spoke, pictures every detail of her face and smile, and wishes to diminish or add nothing. There is not a shadow of doubt as to right or wrong. Only one terrible doubt sometimes crosses him: was it all a dream? Is Mary mistaken? Am I too conceited? Will Natasha smile and say how strange, he is just a man, while I am something different and higher? That is the only doubt. He makes no plans. The happiness before him seems so inconceivable that if he attained it, everything would end there.

A joyful frenzy he had thought himself incapable of possesses him. The whole meaning of life, not for him alone but for the world, seems centred in his love and the possibility of being loved by her. At times everybody seems occupied with his future happiness, or as pleased as he is, hiding it by pretending to be busy. In every word he sees allusions to his joy. He surprises people with significantly happy looks. When he realises they may not know, he pities them and wants to explain that their occupations are frivolous. Civil service, the war, political affairs discussed as if everybody's welfare hung on this or that issue, he hears with a mild pitying smile. Yet in the bright light of his own emotion he sees at once, without effort, what is good and worthy of being loved in everyone he meets.

When he deals with Helene's papers, her memory arouses only pity that she did not know this bliss. Prince Vasili, proud of a new post and fresh decorations, looks like a pathetic, kindly old man. Years later Pierre recalls this period of blissful insanity. The views he formed of men and circumstances remained true for him. When he was in doubt he referred to the views of this madness, and they always proved correct. He may have appeared queer, but he was not so mad as he seemed. He was wiser then, and understood all that is worth understanding, because he was happy. His insanity consisted in this: he no longer waited to discover personal attributes he called good qualities before loving people. His heart overflowed, and by loving without cause he discovered causes for loving them.