Chapter 112
When People Can't Change
1.I am indeed anxious that your friend be moulded and trained, according to your desire. But he has been taken in a very hardened state, or rather (and this is a more difficult problem), in a very soft state, broken down by bad and inveterate habits. I should like to give you an illustration from my own handicraft.[1] 2. It is not every vine that admits the grafting process; if it be old and decayed, or if it be weak and slender, the vine either will not receive the cutting, or will not nourish it and make it a…
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Critical Thinking Exercise
Map Your Rescue Patterns
Think about the last three times you tried to help someone change their behaviour or situation. Write down what you did, how they responded, and what the outcome was. Look for patterns in who you choose to help and how those efforts typically end.
Consider:
- •Notice whether you're drawn to people who ask for help repeatedly
- •Consider how much emotional energy you invest versus the actual results you see
- •Pay attention to whether the person was already taking action or just talking about change
Journaling Prompt
Write about a time when you kept trying to help someone who wasn't ready to change. What did you learn about yourself from that experience, and how might you handle similar situations differently now?
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